How to Converse Successfully…
Do You Make These 10 Mistakes in a Conversation?
Henrik Edberg | The Positivity Blog
Can you improve your conversation skills? Certainly.
It might take a while to change the conversation habits that’s been ingrained throughout your life, but it is very possible.
To not make this article longer than necessary let’s just skip right to some common mistakes many of us have made in conversations and a couple of solutions.
And if you want more in-depth training then join us in my 12-week, step-by-step Smart Social Skills Course where I share the very best things I have learned in the past 8 years about improving social skills and relationship habits.
Ernest Hemingway once said:
“I like to listen. I have learned a great deal from listening carefully. Most people never listen.”
Don’t be like most people. Don’t just wait eagerly for your turn to talk. Put your own ego on hold. Learn to really listen to what people actually are saying.
When you start to really listen, you’ll pick up on loads of potential paths in the conversation. But avoid yes or no type of questions as they will not give you much information. If someone mentions that they went fishing with a couple of friends last weekend you can for instance ask:
Where did you go fishing?
What do you like most about fishing?
What did you do there besides fishing?
The person will delve deeper into the subject giving you more information to work with and more paths for you choose from.
If they say something like: “Oh, I don’t know” at first, don’t give up. Prod a little further. Ask again. They do know, they just have to think about a bit more. And as they start to open up the conversation becomes more interesting because it’s not on auto-pilot anymore.
Asking too many questions
If you ask too many questions the conversation can feel like a bit of an interrogation. Or like you don’t have that much too contribute. One alternative is to mix questions with statements. Continuing the conversation above you could skip the question and say:
Yeah, it’s great to just get out with your friends and relax over the weekend. We like to take a six-pack out to the park and play some Frisbee golf.
Nice. We went out in my friend’s boat last month and I tried these new lures from Sakamura. The blue ones were really great.
And then the conversation can flow on from there. And you can discuss Frisbee golf, the advantages/disadvantages of different lures or your READ MORE: http://www.positivityblog.com/index.php/2006/11/05/do-you-make-these-10-mistakes-in-a-conversation/